Forward to Fifty

This song was first performed at a team meeting. The manager of HP's software support organization in the UK has promoted a business vision known as "Forward to Fifty", meaning the target is 50 million UK pounds in annual revenue. My reasons for writing the song? Well, they're a bit complicated, but let's just say that the subtitle is Bennett's Penance.

The tune is Waltzing Matilda, a handy workhorse for hanging lyrics on. A lyrics horse, maybe?

Once a jolly Welshman sat down with his Omnibook
Under the eye of one Mister Bradley;
And he sang as he sat and waited for his leeks to cook,
"Who'll come a-Forward to Fifty with me?"

Forward to Fifty,
Forward to Fifty,
Who'll come a-Forward to Fifty with me?
And he sang as he sat and waited for his leeks to cook,
"Who'll come a-Forward to Fifty with me?"

Up jumped the Welshman and did some cost analysis,
Discovered that he had to make money;
So he thought and he planned and he summoned all his managers,
"Who'll come a-Forward to Fifty with me?"

Forward to Fifty,
Forward to Fifty,
Who'll come a-Forward to Fifty with me?
So he thought and he planned and he summoned all his managers,
"Who'll come a-Forward to Fifty with me?"

Time for the kick-off, a rare show of extravagance,
The whole business unit taken out to tea;
'Cos he booked a hotel for an SSSO conference:
"Who'll come a-Forward to Fifty with me?"

Forward to Fifty,
Forward to Fifty,
Who'll come a-Forward to Fifty with me?
'Cos he booked a hotel for an SSSO conference:
"Who'll come a-Forward to Fifty with me?"

Great was the vision, because he was the cleverest,
Great was the revenue that had to be;
But now that silly Welshman's got us climbing Everest -
Who'd come a-Forward to Fifty with me?"

Forward to Fifty,
Forward to Fifty,
Who'll come a-Forward to Fifty with me?
But now that silly Welshman's got us climbing Everest,
"Who'll come a-Forward to Fifty with me?"